Freelance Writer, Reporter, and Author

I have too many projects. My list, as it sits right now:

1969 Mercury Cougar: Owned for six years, ran for about six months.

1992 Ford F-150: Owned for three and a half years, ran for about six months (seeing a pattern?)

1990 Lincoln LSC: Owned for two weeks, runs and drives but needs a lot of love

1992 Jeep Wrangler: Owned for two years, die-hard daily driver, still needs lots of love

So, before I get too far along with the Lincoln, I need to do some house cleaning, starting with the broken F-150 in my garage.

Specifically, it is a 1992 F-150 Nite Edition, Flareside 4×4. Rare, as far as F-150’s go. It has sat for about two years due to a busted transmission, though it still starts and drives, thanks to my father. It is also shockingly rust free, with just two small problem areas beneath the extended cab. He recently fixed the transmission, and now the truck needs a few more things to get repaired before we’re ready to put it on the market.

The rear bumper needs to be re-attached (the brackets needed replacing).

One of the rear brake lines needs replacing.

The rear leaf springs also need to be replaced.

Basically, the butt of this truck is busted from too much sitting. The front hubs are also shot, so the 4×4 doesn’t work, but rather than get involved with that, I am going to sell it with the problem and market it as a project truck. Why a project truck? Because even though it is all together and in pretty good shape, it has over 212,000 miles on it. That is a lot of miles, even for an F-150. But if the right person came along, it could either be restored, or turned into one sharp-looking hot rod truck.

I’m downsizing my life. I really, really love cars, and I think I’ve amassed a small collection of cool cars. Really, these are all neat rides, and I’ve owned lots of other cool cars (Saab 900 Turbo, Pontiac Trans Am, Nissan 240sx) but  I’d rather have one cool, functioning car than a bunch of broken ones. I’m going to focus my attention on the Cougar…once I’ve cleaned out my garage and my life.

I am taking this project one step at a time, lest I tear the whole car apart without fixing anything first. I am starting slow by replacing the seats, but already I’m running into headaches.

I managed to remove both of the seats from the Lincoln, only to discover they each weigh close (if not more than) 100 pounds. Just the seats! Each seat has three separate motors. Why? What is so great about power seats? I’ll never know. I just want some lightweight, manual seats that aren’t all tore up.

I picked up a whole set of front and rear seats from a mid-90’s Mustang for just $50. I only need the front seats, but I can always sell the back seats and make some of my money back. The seats are almost the exact same color, no rips, and the only negative is that the rear of the headrests were cut out when some wise guy decided to put tiny TV screens in the back of them (who is going to watch TV in the back of a Mustang??)

Mustang seat on the right, old Lincoln seat on the left

With the seats out, I tried to put the Mustang passenger seat in. No dice. The holes on the Mustang seat tracks do not line up with the bolts on the floor. The driver’s side seat has a power track, so I didn’t even bother trying to fit it in (I had planned on buying a manual rack anyway.) Oh cruel fate! So now I am left with several options;

• Buy the manual seat tracks from a 99-04 Mustang (they are supposed to be a direct bolt in)
• Modify the manual seat rack to fit the Lincoln floor bracket
• Find a VERY rare pair of Lincoln manual seat tracks (they only came with the “sport delete” seats apparently)

I also went out and bought new battery cables, since the Lincoln is no longer holding a charge. Alas, the gentlemen at the auto parts counter sold me the wrong part (as they often tend to do). So I get to return those tomorrow and try to get the right ones.

Right now, my total investment for the project is;

• The car itself: $500
• Trailer: $50
• Mustang Seats $50
• Total: $600

We’ll see what happens next. Right now, my car sits dead and empty. But not for long.

Until I come up with a better name, I am sticking with the obscure Aqua Teen Hunger Force reference.

That being said, I took some pictures of the real problem with my new project…the interior. It is all leather in the rare gray pattern, but cheap leather likes to crack when exposed to excessive sun and is given lots of time to age. The driver’s seat looks like an alligator used it as a back scratcher.

Right now, I am seriously considering having the seats reupholstered as locating and shipping replacement seats has proven difficult. I had wanted to just ditch the heavy, eight-way adjustable seats for something more comfortable and less complicated. That might night happen.

I might just tear them out and duct tape myself to the floor. Uncomfortable, yet effective.

Right now, I’ve got some good leads on upholsterers though. I also hunted down a power window motor, but I need to make sure it fits (it’s from a Lincoln Continental…)

The dashboard is also…well, ugly. There are ways to save a dashboard, as well as ways to just cover them up. Finding a replacement one though is almost impossible, and taking the dash out is very involved. I think I can live with a few cracks.

That is it for now. Nothing exciting, yet, though plans are well under way.

I picked her up today from Long Island. A 1990 Lincoln LSC with 97k miles on the clock. Running, driving, and most everything works. New, these cars sold for around $30,000 but I picked this diamond in the rough up for $500 (plus $50 to rent a trailer). I’ve always wanted one of these cars but I rarely found one I liked or that didn’t have an exorbitant selling price. The seller was a nice guy, and the car used to belong to his father. He wanted the car to go to a good home, and it has. I am going to take care of this vehicle.

First the bad, then the good.

Bad:

• Faded paint on roof and hood
• Both mufflers rotted out
• Leaky master cylinder
• Radio doesn’t work
• Cracks in dash
• Saggy headliner
• Missing weather gaskets along rear window
• Both seats completely shot
• Drivers side window won’t roll down

The Good!

• 97,000 miles
• 5.0 engine with synthetic oil used its entire life
• Recently rebuilt transmission
• Runs strong
• Sounds good (maybe because of the lack of mufflers)
• Very smooth ride thanks to the air suspension
• Sharp, rare car
• Cheap!

I have big plans for this car. First I need to bring it up to snuff, but since it is winter I don’t plan on driving it anytime soon. I can take my time and make it really nice. Believe me, this is gonna be nice…for as little money as possible. First though, I need to figure out a good name that isn’t a cliche…though “Hot Rod Lincoln” is an awesome song.

I love working on cars. Moreso than driving them.

This weekend I am bringing home a new project for myself. Something that runs and drives but could really, really use some love.

It is big. And it has a V8. And it is going to be a challenge. But I love a good challenge, and I love doing something different.

This is going to be very, very different.

I am dubbing it “Untitled Master Shake Project”. Because I sorta know what I want to do with it. But not totally.

I finally figured out how to post a gallery and I got some pretty sweet pictures posted up. Definitely more to come.

I hate Twitter. So why the exclamation point?

I felt it was warranted, because I am going to actually try to update it.

I reiterate, I hate Twitter. Most people use it to post the uninteresting minutia about their lives that makes them feel important.

Some people actually use it for interesting purposes though, and well, it IS a tool, and it reaches a lot of people.

Therefore, I must tweet. I don’t want to, but I will, and now the link is there for all to enjoy too. I’ll try to keep it interesting.

Day two. I’ve been scheming up ways to create my own website that people will actually want to visit. I’ve got some pretty good ideas…but I can’t talk about them here.

Not yet.

What I can talk about is my novel is now on its 90th page. That is farther than I have ever gotten before, I’m not even close to done. Though I can’t decide whether or not I should post them up, for fear someone might steal it. I like to take my time when it comes to writing. It wouldn’t take much for someone to rip me off and finish my own project before me…

Yea, maybe I’m a little paranoid.

So what?

How does one start a blog? I guess like this.

It is 2010, I’ve been a college graduate for a full six months, and I am finally ready to make my mark on the world. Well more like a bruise. But a bruise in an inconspicuous place. Like on the back of the head. Yeah, that works.

This is gonna be fun.